If there is one thing that I have noticed about being pregnant, it is that everyone has advice. Don’t’ get me wrong, I need advice and lots of it. (I will get to that part in a minute.) But lately I have been getting advice on things that I don’t want. I am sure this problem will get worse.
Here’s how it goes:
Unneeded Advice: At this point I am still fitting into some of my regular clothes. However, for some reason several people at my work keep insisting that I go out and buy a bunch of maternity clothes. One lady even texted me on a Friday night to remind me that I need to go shopping for maternity clothes, as if my expanding belly and unbuttoned pants were not enough to remind me.
I am going to get maternity clothes. If fact, with help from my Mom I have purchased a few things. But I don’t have money just lying around to go buy a new wardrobe that I will only use for a short time. I will get there. No rush.
Needed Advice: Where is a place to buy cheap maternity clothes?
Unneeded Advice: People like to comment on my appearance. Apparently being pregnant gives everyone the right to be rude without actually being rude. Example #1: A coworker walked by at work and called me chubby. Perhaps it was a joke, but I don’t find it funny. Example #2: Another coworker told me about a girl she knew that ended up with boils on her face. Thank you. I really needed to hear that. Now I have another thing to worry about, getting face boils.
Speaking of bellies. People at work keep asking me if I am sure that everything is fine because so-in-so that they know who is pregnant is as far a long as I am and they are showing a lot more. They say I should double check with my doctor that everything is OK. Just FYI I have checked with my doctor and everything at this point is fine. I am a tall girl. I have lots of room for a growing baby.
Needed Advice: Is there a magic lotion that will make my belly not itch as much? Anyone?
Unneeded Advice: I need help with girl names. I admit it. We have a few that we like, but we just can’t decide what feels right. I change my mind everyday. I think I like old fashioned names. There is a coworker of mine that keeps suggesting that I name our baby the same name as her teenage son. No offense, but I don’t want to name my kid after someone else’s kid. That’s weird. At first I thought it was a joke, but now it’s been suggested so many times I think she may be serious.
Needed Advice: I do welcome name suggestions! Just not your kids name. That’s weird.
Side Note: If you are my coworker who has stumbled upon my blog and think or know that I may be writing about you. I am sorry. Just blame it on my hormones and/or stop being weird!
More Advice that I need:
Do you have to use special laundry detergent for baby clothes?
Do you prefer the stand alone high chairs or ones that strap to a chair?
Are the car seats that go into the strollers the best route or two separate things?
I know I still have a while to figure most things out but I am obsessed with looking at baby things online.
I’m sure I’ll have more needed advice later. I need lots. I promise not to complain about any given advice on my blog in the future.
A January Experiment
4 years ago
15 comments:
oh the unwanted advice. i had one person tell me over and over to "hold the baby as much as you can. dont feel bad about holding her too much". umm thanks, because i was going to feel bad about holding my baby.
There is a good chance this will be a novel. You sound so much like me 1 year ago its scary.
Cheap maternity clothes: the ross in turkey creek has a maternity section. its small but I got ALL my maternity clothes there. shirts for $6 and pants for $15. really cant beat it, though its hit and miss as ross always is. i also bought normal clothes in larger sizes. I used the rubber button around the button trick until like 7 months. and if youre interested in a bella band, I used mine a TON but others didnt like them. I used it after i gave birth too when i didnt quite fit into my pants yet. in fact i still use it but dont tell anyone.
i love coworkers. when i was pregnant i had one that always talked about how huge i was and called me handicapped.
Laundry detergent: the sell that baby detergent (cant remember it right now) but it costs a million dollars. we use a "free and clear" detergent just because i prefer it anyway, but when we were at my parents we used regular and it was fine. if you and kase dont really have sensitive skin it shouldnt matter, but others will tell you differently. i like the "free and clear" because its a little better option but not super expensive.
the high chair i think depends on the space you have. i would love a real high chair but (as you know) we just dont have space for one. we use a bumbo now and then we have a seat that attaches to the chair later when she is a little bigger. i would get a real highchair if i had room and the money tho:)
I would say a travel system (carseat and stroller) all the way. Chris and I werent going to, but at the last second I convinced him it was worth it and every time we use it chris is like "this is the best purchase we made". we love it. there are lots of different styles and colors and strollers that come it travel systems, and lots of variety in price. We have a Graco, which is a popular brand and in the middle of the prices. ) Oh my gosh i studied carseats and strollers so long i could write a book.
names depends on your "taste". on babycenter.com you can type type in a name you like and it says "you may also like these names" and lists some from a similar style. there are too many. its a good thing chris was stuck on Carly the whole time or i wouldve gone insane (though i still went a little insane)
anyway, theres my novel.
I can only answer one of your "needed advice"s: Dreft laundry detergent is really common for baby clothes and it smells good :). I wish I had advice for the itchy belly, but I never had success finding anything! Oh, and I bought a stroller/carseat combo and I love it, especially since Patrick spent the first four weeks of his life sleeping in it because of his reflux. If he got fussy at night, I could just push the stroller/carseat back and forth from bed and it would knock him out.
Good luck with all the bad advice, and if I ever give you any feel free to put me in my place and tell me off!!!
oh, yeah the itchy belly. someone recommended Creme de Corps to me and i love it. $28 a bottle so pricey but lasted my entire pregnancy and beyond.
I've heard this place does maternity clothes and they also have a special "new mom's" event. http://www.dkdkgoose.com/knoxville/main.html
I can't really comment on anything else.
I need to visit teach you. I like your questions and your funny stories of rude people (sorry, maybe I shouldn't find joy in your sorrow :^)). I want to give my advice--saying what I think is fun! Yes, I will visit you, and you will ask of me all those things which you want to know and I will keep my yap shut about the things you don't want to know. :^)
Trust me, there is never a shortage of unneeded advise...ever. And the hormones fluctuating really don't help make coping any easier! As for needed advice, I am happy to put in my two cents! See below, call if you need more, or just tell me to shut it :)
2)I was massive. Some women are, some aren't. Since I had to have maternity clothes almost from the beginning I shopped sales like a mad woman. You can ask my hubby, I hate paying too much for 1 thing when I can get a whole bag or two full for the same amount. Target (check different stores), Motherhood, & JCPenny's have good sales when they have them. But try everything on or don't take the tags off until you do. They might say they are the same style, but they aren't.
2)I used the typical CocoButter lotion for a while, but then I swithched to Curel Stages. They have one for Pregnancy & Motherhood & it worked awsome. Didn't sure the roadmap on my midsection, but made the itchy feeling disappear for a bit!
3) Go with what you think. It doesn't matter what we think. Old fashioned names are beautiful, though!
4)I doesn't hurt. Livvy has REALLY sensitive skin. So we have always used Purex Free & Clear or All Free & Clear. Both do a great job & are way cheaper than the fancy bottles. For fabric softener, Downy or Kroger store brand Free & Clear does great!
5)We have stand alones. But check the safety stuff on anything before you buy it...duh! Graco is awful. Evenflo is great!
6)We had the carrier with the care seat base & stroller. It was really nice when she was little just to put here in that & carrier her around. It is freakin' heavy, but seemed more comfortable for her. But our little one grew too fast & we had to switch to a convertible chair that will grow with her.
I have no advice except names. I have heard dreft or something like that is good for babies. Maybe target for clothes because I see a lot of maternity on sales racks. But anyways, here are names.... I looked on a website, I'm so unoriginal.
Abigail
ava
olivia
sophia (sophie)
grace
gracie
lillian
sadie
hazel
nora
adrianna
amelia
caroline
claire (clare)
edith
elaine
eleanor
gabrielle
Jade
Sydney
Valerie
Zoe
Sorry, it's me again. It's funny to read all of teh comments because the one thing I learned about asked-for-advice is that it's helpful to give you some direction, but it's all trial and error. Some people swear by certain things, other people hate it. Don't take anyone's advice as gospel. Just try one thing at a time and expect somethings to not work, and some things to work better than you expected.
Oh and I'm sorry, I have to ask, have random people or people that don't know you well enough found that it's ok to rub your belly? I've heard that's common for pregnant women.
I Tiffany Strong, promise you Laura Richardson Clapp that I will never rub your belly like you're a freaking troll doll, UNLESS you ask me to. I personally think it would be awkward. Just sayin'.
Ohhh and why do they think it's ok to point out that your face is breaking out? Your hormones are raging now and you have a freaking HUMAN growing inside you. I think your body and hormones are like woah what's happening! You should point out to these people that they have a big mole on their face or say "WOW!!! Have you gained a few pounds? What a chunker!"
With my last baby I didnt buy any maternity pants. I bought this thing called a bella belly band. It goes over your unbuttoned pants to help keep them up plus giving you extra support, not to mention it makes your pants look like maternity pants.
I think a travel system is better (car seat and Stroller)
I had so much fun reading this post Laura.
Pregnancy seems to bring out all of those unwanted comments.
You look beautiful! Enjoy your pregnancy...you will remember this one the very most.
i found cheap maternity clothes at khols...they have a clearance rack in the maternity section
Ah the many joys of being pregnant...and sadly it's just the beginning. The "advice" continues after you have your baby as well.
My suggestions (but everyone is different!)
~Travel system is great, especially with a new born. Different types, styles, etc. But know that you'll carry the baby in the carseat to the stores, church, etc for several months before they get too heavy. Helps build your arm muscles, right?! We often didn't use the stroller in stores though and instead used a baby front pack carrier. I've used the travel system with both my girls and love it. Graco is what we've got
~Baby names: Check out this book called "50,001+ baby names" or something like that from your library or buy it. You look through it by "themes" and alphabetically. Plus it's got the meaning and different variations of the spelling to meet your needs! We thought of names and would look through it. Brought us LOTS of laughs from some of the names if nothing else :)
~Laundry soap: Many babies are good with whatever. If you see a rash or hives switch to something "clear" or Dreft (little pricey though).
~Maternity clothes: Sadly I couldn't purchase an entire wardrobe in 2 different sizes like I wanted to. Check out the clearance at Kohls, Old Navy, Motherhood, Ross (if yours has a maternity section) as those were the cheapest yet cutest stuff. Online at those stores are great too (as you can buy them online in different sizes and return the ones that dont work to the actual store to save money on shipping) Check back anytime you're around those stores as their clothing changes quite often when on clearance!
Great post. You are so awesome. Kase really scored.
I can't give you much advice I raised boys in the old days where we had fewer options.
I like the name Marisol but there is always the soup name:)
Please don't name the peanut any of my boys names. Although I do like Kase, Tommy, Scott and Ryan they really don't fit a girl except maybe Ryan.
Love ya
Hey Laura. I am trying to remember you. i think if I saw you face to face I would. Or if you can remind me how I embarassed myself while you were over (I always say something stupid to new people) than that may spark a memory.
Thanks for being a blog stalker. I needed that this week. I got raked over the coals in marriage counseling. I need something to build me back up.
YOu have really asked for the mom's to come out of the woodwork with this post.
I love my girl's names, but since I can't suggest their old fashioned and classic names because they are MY kids, I will tell you others that I would like to use. Lucy, Audrey, Nina. Why don't you name her after me. Alice is coming back..she was the coolest character in Twilight.
I will add you to my blogroll.
My advice...invest in a good classic crib that you can use for boys or girls. Don't buy anything girly but bedding. Anything you buy, make it gender neutral, so you can use the same stuff with your next kid who may be a boy. Plenty of people will buy you pink, so don't worry.
I love having a stroller that you can fit your carseat into. It is very convenient. But, it is also a shame to buy a stroller now and have to upgrade to a double stroller. If you plan to have a bunch of kids, just get the double stroller now. It will be a great investment and the extra spot can hold all the baby stuff that you tend to go overboard with on your first one.
Indulge a little. You won't believe this but we have had less money every time we have had a child. I wish I would have bought the right things with the first one.
You don't need that stupid laundry detergent. Two of my four have very sensitive skin and they were fine with whatever laundry detg I used. I never have washed my baby clothes seperate. Soaking in Biz will get out every stain. You don't think you need to know this now, but you do.
Real high chair all the way.
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